Archive for April, 2009
In early April, 2009, A woodchuck holed up in the engine compartment of a New York’s mans minivan and ate the ignition wires and dined on the hood insulation. But this story ends on a funny note and a special breakfast for it’s owner. It’s about my son Josh Consler, owner of Vesa’s Automotive in Rochester, New York. He has never performed well with critters. Even at his current age!
Josh and the Critter
This tale really had it’s beginnings around 1982 in Florida when Josh Consler was about 10 years old. His scallop diving adventure with his dad and brother Chris in the intercostal waterway off Tarpon Springs brought out the best in him. While snorkeling for scallops in about 6-8 feet of crystal clear water, Josh suddenly came face-to-face with a Blue Crab. Well, like a missile being launched from a submarine, Josh came rocketing out of that water and almost landed in the boat. His screams were deafening.
In 1983, I had taken Chris and Josh on a guided wild boar/turkey hunt in Fish Eating Creek in South Florida. Chris and Josh had set up for a photo shoot in a camouflage tent for turkey. Being quiet and patient as required for good pictures, Josh became quite alarmed when he spotted a large snake crawling into the tent. So much so that he uprooted the whole camera stage as he tore out of the tent. He was heard all the way back to camp.
1989 was the year that Josh turned 16 and brother Chris had taken him deer hunting in Mendon, NY. Setting Josh up in his own tree stand and advising him to keep quiet, Chris had gone on to another tree stand about 500 yards away. As the day wore on and nearing dusk (a good time as deer start moving), Josh, not hearing anything, thought Chris had forgotten him and started getting scared. To the point where he started calling out for his brother. His outbursts brought total quiet to the lively forest and Chris came to his rescue. No deer that day.
Well, I could site more, but it’s now Saturday morning around 6:45AM in April, 2009. Wendy (my daughter-in-law) called and asked if I could come over early for breakfast, a ritual going on for about five years now. Starting my car was unusual that morning as the engine sputtered like it was starving for gas and the vibrations were felt on the accelerator as well. Hmmm! I thought….well after all it‘s cold, maybe it’ll smooth out on the highway with a little acceleration. Not so and the small vibrations were felt all the way, though with periods of forgiveness. Within a mile, the “check engine” light starting blinking and dollar signs started passing through my head. After all, I just paid over $400 for new plugs and a total tune-up.
After I had my breakfast, I left to get cleaned up for the trip to Rochester and vibrated all the way there. I also hoped the problem would go away when I got up to 60mph on Route 390. As it seemed to get worse, I called Josh (owner of Vesa’s Automotive) and explained the problem and could I drop my van off on my way to my destination. Sure, bring it in.
Arriving about 8:30AM, I parked in front of the windows of Vesa’s Automotive customer service area. Entering, I gave Josh my keys and he went out to the shop area to retrieve the trouble code sensor used to locate the problem. Waiting for him as I wanted to accompany him on the trouble shooting, he had gone out a different door to my van. The next thing I heard was a very loud bang and Josh came screaming back in to the customer service area in front of another customer or two screaming…“There’s a critter under the hood and I’m not going back out there. “ ……….“What Critter?” I asked. “I don’t know………it was big and brown and was looking right at me. I slammed the hood closed. Maybe a groundhog!”
“Larry (his partner)…….go look under my Dad’s hood!” exclaimed Josh. That he did (in my presence this time) and he too, slammed it shut. In a blur, I noticed a lot of “stuff” hanging down from inside the momentarily raised hood. “Hey Mike (former shop owner)….come here and look under this hood!” shouted Larry. Only this time, I made sure it didn’t get slammed shut again. Propping the hood up, the insulation was chewed away and hanging down like shredded paper and residue scattered all over and throughout the engine. What a mess this “critter” made. But where was the critter? Josh had been watching too many scary movies.
Since we couldn’t find the critter, I left my van with Josh and borrowed his van. A few hours later, Josh called and my van was ready. The critter had chewed through spark plug wires causing the problem. And, they had caught and killed the critter. Turned out when they drove my van inside, they witnessed the critter jumping out from under my van’s undercarriage and up and into another car’s undercarriage. They then brought that car inside and the critter escaped again. This time running around the shop where is was subsequently corned and was brought to a it’s demise. The GROUNDHOG now rests in peace in it’s new surroundings………..the dumpster!
How the critter survived two round trips to Rochester and back with the heat of the engine boggles the imagination. He won’t have to worry about his shadow anymore.
The next day, I was treated to a groundhog entrée for breakfast, courtesy of my daughter-in-law!